If you’ve followed my previous reincarnation posts, you’ll be familiar with my premise that contemporary celebrities are recycled versions of former stars and historical figures. Same people, different era.
Recently, another celebrity to attract my — and just about everybody’s — attention is Amanda Bynes.
Bynes once had a glorious Hollywood career on television and in the movies. Until, of course, she started behaving strangely and upset a few people, most memorably Miley Cyrus when she tweeted that Cyrus was ugly. This started a celebrity spat between the actress and the singer long before Miley’s brawl with Sinead O Connor, who doesn’t think Miley is ugly, but advised her to wear more clothes when she sits atop a wrecking ball in music videos.
Amanda Bynes starred in a few movies, including She’s the Man, co-starring Channing Tatum (who appears to have stolen Chris Klein’s career). Klein was doing pretty well in Hollywood until he split with Katie Holmes (who then married Tom Cruise and we all know how that ended) and checked himself into rehab for alcohol problems. In the interim, Tatum, a former exotic dancer who knows how to tease ladies in his G-string, managed to muscle in on Klein’s roles and pushed him aside. Tatum recently admitted he is a high functioning alcoholic and if he ever checks himself into rehab, Chris Klein could potentially make a comeback.
Anyway, Amanda Bynes gets carted off to the psych wards fairly frequently — much like Frances Farmer, a successful 1940s movie actress whose life you can watch implode in the 1982 movie Frances, starring Jessica Lange (who has never had a mental illness).
In the Jessica Lange movie (though it never happened in reality) Frances is forcibly given a lobotomy. Thankfully, nobody gets lobotomies anymore because celebrities can’t sustain a career in a vegetative state — though this doesn’t explain Kim Kardashian’s career.
Amanda Bynes (who is not lobotomised) has a habit of tweeting idiotic and insulting messages when she’s unwell. Farmer also insulted everyone and was violent and alcoholic. Bynes is not an alcoholic, nor is she violent — but she has been known to throw bongs from apartment windows, thus potentially endangering unsuspecting pedestrians. Similarly, both actresses were arrested for driving offences before their mental illness became apparent and required hospitalisation. Like Bynes, Farmer’s mother took legal guardianship each time her daughter became unwell.
Farmer made periodic comebacks on stage and screen including a successful television career. She also started a cosmetic company. Bynes already had a fashion and cosmetic company but was recently kicked out of fashion college when she had another outbreak of erratic behaviour.
Both actresses were diagnosed with schizophrenia and bi-polar disorder. And if Bynes’s life trajectory follows Farmer’s then we can expect to see frequent hospitalisations, a career comeback, more arrests and a book followed by a movie about her life. In which case, Jessica Lange is too old to play Bynes but Miley Cyrus and Chris Klein might like to audition.
More celebrity reincarnation posts
What do you think you were? It would be based upon the premise of genetic memory and reincarnation and each week would feature celebrities and their past lives
The public’s interest in the life of a reality TV star, mother, wife, and woman with such an impressive derriere that she ‘threatened to break the internet.’